Rivers of Tears...

OMG. I cried til the point of retching. I've not cried that long or that hard in...hell...since I left her house 2 years ago. And I really don't even know WHY except for...this came out of nowhere & it makes absolutely NO sense whatsoever as to why THIS became such an issue! FFS. My body aches, my head is splitting open, I didn't sleep at all (& now it's too late to sleep), my entire face is swollen, my eyes are burning, I can't breathe out my nose. Every time I thought I was done, I'd start all over again. *sighs* I'm beyond a hot mess. From crying. The entire night...

Sheer grief & frustration. I don't know what else to attribute it to. All I know is that the words she spoke out of anger are the ones that are branded on my mind. But it's whatever, right? It doesn't really matter. I'm just stupid. Fine. I'm stupid. I feel like I'll be retreating from the world for more than just last evening. Dunno for how long but...I'm not ready to be me just yet...*sighs*

Good thing I'm off tomorrow. Is it tomorrow yet? :-(