Change...

CHANGE is inevitable!!  Our lives change on a daily basis & we barely even notice it.  When the BIG changes happen...we absolutely notice...but what matters is...how we deal with those changes!  I remember vividly all of the major shifts in my life.  And I can't say that I dealt with ANY one of them very well.  Except maybe my work situation...with Manda leaving...Kelli dropping to one day a week...me becoming Manager.  That one flowed pretty well actually.  Maybe it was a Sign...?!  That I've finally grown up & have had enough experience & know myself well enough now...to instinctively know how to let "things happen".  I'm not saying ALL of my bad habits have disappeared.  They haven't...though I wish they had!  lol  This latest Big Shift...has me thinking.  And what's most important about that is the feelings that go along with the thinking.  The 1st time Sara obliterated me with her Assuming, I didn't function...I wasn't human...for well over a year!  She's now banished me a 2nd time in the exact same format...but...I'm dealing with it differently this time.  I'm still ME.  I'm still ok.  I'm still functioning.  I'm still human.  Being wrongly accused of something goes all over me...almost as bad as being ignored does.  It literally makes me insane!  And this all stems from the situation I endured with Nancy, being railroaded, put in jail for 3 days, losing my ENTIRE previous existence...my memories, stuff that belonged to my Daddy, items I'd collected throughout my life that can't be replaced.  I had absolutely NO way of proving myself!!  I just had to sit through it & wait for time to pass on by.

At this point...I'm still a little sad.  But I don't hate her.  I just am disappointed that she turned out to be EVERYTHING that she swore she wasn't...*shrugs*...meh.  And NOTHING that she swore she was.  *sighs*  Worst part is...she'll never ever realize that...