Stupid...Stupid...Stupid...!!

Yes, unfortunately, I DO understand how stupid I sound to people!! I think it's partially why I've stopped trying to share my thoughts/feelings. To explain it to someone who hasn't lived it or experienced it is like...trying to explain to a man what it's like to be a woman. Or...explain to a white man what it's like to live as a black man. Severe core differences in the psyche that are impossible to explain to someone who can't conceivably grasp the concept of it. That's not a BAD thing!! Just...*sighs*...it's just futile to even attempt such an explanation because both parties will only end up frustrated.

Don't get me entirely wrong though...I'd give anything to stop being stupid. I'd give anything to NOT know what this feels like...

I'd give anything to stop suffering needlessly...