So I toted the cake with me to work. Cindy was mad cuz she couldn't have any...LOL! We close at 5 & Book Club is at 6:30. NO way I'm driving home & then coming back...that's pointless cuz I'd get here & just turn around to go back...lol. So I worked for an extra hour after closing. I STILL can't remember how to get to Karen's so I hafta follow Manda. haha She picked up Jenn & I waited in the parking lot of the store for her to pass & pulled out behind her. ;-p It's been a year or more since Jenn has been there. She had some life issues to deal with for a long time there but we've missed her & glad she's back! :-) Ali didn't go tonight. She had a business meeting to go to. Karen was sad. haha Towards the end, Karen let her puppies out! She has 3 Jack Russells & a Boxer. Jasmine, the Boxer, was all over all of us...so were the Jacks but REALLY the Boxer....hahahaha!!! She especially LOVED Manda! ;-) Too freaking CUTE!!!
Oh...& the cake...was a HIT...HAHAHAHA!!
Jasmine even got a lick of the icing! ;-)
Cindy was scheduled off tomorrow & me on Friday but...at 4 pm, we changed that all around. Rob is definitely going back into surgery on Friday, so Cindy is going back up to Jacksonville to sit with Kim all day. So...I'm off tomorrow. Which actually works out well cuz of Book Club tonight! I didn't get home til 9:30! Then had to put trash & 2 recycling bins out for tomorrow. THEN a bath! hahaha And I'm STILL wired up so...it's good that I don't need to get up at 6:30 am! ;-)
I missed a lot of the BPL convo today but...last night, Tracie & Bill broke up with their girlfriend. :-( It's really bizarre how much their situation mirrors what I went through with Sara & Ben! So I can really, really empathize. She's uber upset still. And that's gonna take a long while to heal. I feel so bad for her. It truly sucks when a relationship ends like that...simply due to a refusal of communication!! *sighs*
Speaking of Sara...like I said last weekend, we'd sorta been trying to talk. Well, it didn't take long to know that nothing has changed & she refuses to hear anything I say. I just don't understand. She has her mind made up of the way things ARE/WERE...whatever. And I cannot say anything to her in difference to her beliefs/ideas/feelings. I can't get her to understand or accept that I didn't MEAN things the way she took them! And there's just no fighting that. *sighs* I finally said to her on Sunday, the way I see it, we only have 3 choices here. 1) She creates that damned blog like she'd suggested but then got pissed off at me about cuz I didn't trust her to follow through on it & she disappeared for 6 1/2 weeks. Just DO the damned thing, see if we can allow it to work. 2) Completely start over like we're strangers & try to get to know each other all over again. We'd come to this conclusion once before but neither one of us could let go of the past hurts, accusations or assumptions so it never even went anywhere. OR...3) She just disappear & leave me the fuck alone FOREVER. Granted, I've gotten a helluva lot better at recovering from her disappearing in the last couple of years. I don't sob for weeks on end anymore! But...even if she were to completely disappear from my life, I imagine it'll be YEARS before I truly get her out of my system. I still love her...regardless of everything. I still miss her. That's not something that's just going to go away because she's not in my life.
Apparently...she's chosen #3...cuz I haven't heard from her in 3 days now. I'm sad, disappointed & relieved...all at the same time, about that. I know there's no possible way to communicate with her anymore so it's pointless to go through the heartache of trying...BUT...there's still that part of me that...hoped. :/ Bleh. Anyway. It is what it is. I told her SHE needed to make the choice of what she wanted to do & she wanted to know why it was all on her...cuz...no matter what...I NEVER have a choice in the matter! EVER!! She is ALWAYS the one that gets pissed off/hurt, deletes/blocks me & disappears. Every single time!! And I'm just left here...with zero recourse. I can message her til my hands fall off...she simply doesn't respond. I can't go into battle with that anymore. I just can't. I don't have the energy for it anymore. :/ So...she made her choice...obviously. Now I pick up the pieces once again & move forward...
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